I was sitting at my computer when Pop walked in, like his usual self. "Hi"
I was surprised. "Hi" I said. I pushed my chair back as he grabbed a stool & sat down.
I told him we'd never been in a fight like that in 22 yrs. He said he knew that. I cried so hard I got a migraine & only Jim had ever made me cry that hard.
"Well," is what I got. That he had been mad at Tess. I said so, you took it out on me. He replied that, "..if I took it out on you, I'm sorry." IF!?
He pulled out a list about 2x3 with writing on it. He was going down the list of things he'd been doing so I hadn't seen him enough to be able to tell he was "different".
1. He went to England
2. He returned & was recuperating for a week.
3. He started working on the house up the hill.
4. Then I was in KS
5. He was in Kansas
So, he was pointing out that I had not seen him enough to see a difference in him.
I said that he came here for my birthday. Where he barely spoke. Then Father's Day.
He said he didn't remember Father's Day. I said that was pretty sad. Later he said he felt that Father's Day was just commercial to get your money.
I said it wasn't, that it was to celebrate your father. He said it was commercial to get your money & he had told mother that over & over, but she didn't listen. I said too bad my sister, mom & I didn't see it that way. He disagreed & I said fine we won't worry about it any more.
I pointed out that he popped in to see us & kids & I saw him then.
He went on about how he was tired when he came home & Tonya had fixed him dinner. "How stupid was that? If she had told me when I called from Dallas I would have told her to forget it."
I said she thought it would be nice.
"I was on a 12 hr flight."
I said she cleaned the house and...
"She did?"
I was getting upset.
"Yes, & she thought dinner would be nice." So he complained more about that & I said, "Do you think about things from anyone else's point of view? She was trying to be nice!" He had also yelled at one of the kids in the car (on the way home), I reminded him & we didn't stay long, knowing he'd be tired.
About the house: He said he was letting "me" move out there to help out so we'd have a roof over our head etc. (I have a rental I am in.)
I told him he hadn't told Tonya @ mum. He said, "What about her?"
"You haven't told us about taking her ashes etc."
He said, "I have the booklet & photos."
"But you never showed us."
"You all haven't come out."
"We don't feel welcome."
"I don't know why."
"We just don't."
I said he hadn't even asked @ Ian when I said he was hurt.
"I was wondering."
"But you didn't ask."
"I hurt my leg a lot & I am usually ok. So, what did he do?"
I told him. He never asked how Faith was doing or Connor.
Something else was said & I said, "I know you just think I sit on my butt all day & do nothing." I looked at him & he said,
"You said it, not me."
By this time I was really upset.
"I don't need you here to slap me around. I can call my ex for that. He thinks I am a crappy mother & don't raise my kids right either."
"Ookay." He spread his hands.
"It was bad enough you said I didn't care @ my mother." I got up to walk out of the room. I turned back & said, "And you can do what you like with mother & your property."
I walked into Tess' room, sat down & cried. Nikki came & took care of me.
I expected him to leave as I was in there a while, but when I walked out he was still sitting on the stool. So, I went to Ian's room & grabbed his sheets. I came out & said angrily, "She's leaving you know." (Tess)
"Is she?"
"She's packing up & leaving."
I went back into Tess' room to do the laundry; went outside & back out & he was still sitting there. So, I walked out the front door & walked down to Kerry's. At some point, he left.
I also wrote A Brenda who was diplomatic & said he had called her & sounded like he had tears in his voice. I have those e-mails, but it also showed he is telling everyone different things.
Tess & I tried talking to U Jerry who thought we were reading too much into it. He said Pop is being who he is, but without mom. Well, if this is him without mom, then I don't want to be around him.
U Jerry said dad was coming to get him so U Jerry could drive one of the vans to pop's house. I was out spraying weeds & grass when they came. U Jerry teased that I missed a spot. Pop got out & I didn't think he'd talk, but he said, "Morning." I simply said, "Hi."
I am hurt & confused by it all. I rewrote Aunt Brenda & told her our side of it.
I don't know what to do. Right now, I simply don't want to talk to him or see him. His birthday is the 12th & I don't know what to do @ that either. It will be the first birthday Connor has without him Gpa.
No comments:
Post a Comment