August 17, 2001
Connor took his first ½ pill of Adderall @ 7:40 a.m.
He is in a foul mood. Grumpy mostly. Complained of being tired @ 10 a.m. He looked pale @ 12-1pm. We went to get a drink, ate and returned home. He was yelling at his brother 1:30pm in the car and at home.
August 18, 2001
Connor took full 5mg pill this am @ 7:45a.m. So far he is eating fine. He had an outburst at Ian and me. He got a time out to calm down. He made odd comments @ his brother messing things up of his that made no sense. Ian hadn’t been doing anything.
Connor is still peeing on the floor. He says he has no energy to get to the toilet. He acts remorseful. He’s been upset a lot at his dad.
August 19, 2001
Connor 1 pill 6:30 a.m. Grumpy and this is about the third day of fussing with his brother. He was bothered by the vacuum noise. (This has occurred since he was a baby.) Being fussy @ brother and bother him. He isn’t moping now @ 7:30a.m.
Connor is still being very hostile. He wants Ian to leave him alone; he is very touchy.
Brief nap.
His constant need to run and scream through the house has seemed to subside, but I wonder if this is depression I am now seeing. Constantly agitated, irritable, frustrated and crying a lot. 4:10 pm
August 20, 2001
8:25 a.m. I called Dr. Starr. I have not given him his Adderall yet. Connor is happy and back to being overactive. Loud, racing about, etc.
No more Adderall. Asked about Bi-Polar testing. She said that BP is such a bad thing for a child that we will try the stimulants and then the antidepressants. If that doesn’t work we will probably have to go to Las Cruces or Albuquerque for testing.
We are now trying Ritalin, which I do not want to try. Short acting. We will start ½ pill in the a.m.
August 21, 2001
Connor started ½ (1/2 5mg) of Ritalin @ 7:30 a.m.
At school: Crying when he got off the bus. He wanted to go home to be with mom. He didn’t want to do anything.
2pm he was bouncing. He didn’t want to settle down, sit still. He crossed his arms and didn’t want “rest time”. Being defiant. Put by him on the rug and eventually he read a book.
August 22, 2001
Full Ritalin @ 7:30 am
I have better luck when he is off this medicine. Not eating, mood swings. He had a fit ½ way home. I went to the doctor’s office and said “next”. She is going to try an antidepressant and see.
Back to violent talk; Death, shocking (electricity), killing, etc. Perhaps the Adderall again and an antidepressant will work.
August 23, 2001
I called and talked about Adderall (1/2 tab) w/ Paxil. Will start when it comes in. I hope that helps. He is a bit grumpy and whiney now. He does not want to go to school.
The bus dropped Connor off at his G. A Joey’s house. She said he seemed tired, but not overly active. He had French fries and ate them all. He played on 2 small mattresses. She wore them out.
Riding golf cart, he ran through the yards, getting wet. No outbursts. No crying. He got all wet and seemed very happy. (She runs a mobile home court.)
August 24 – Connor took ½ Adderall. He is kind of blah waiting on bus. He didn’t want to ride the bus. Gave him a hug/kiss bye and went @ 11:15 a.m.
He came home at 3pm in a good mood. He showed me his papers and play dough from school. He was in a fairly good mood all evening. He got in trouble/upset 2 times. He yelled, “Just leave me alone” & ran off being very loud.
Aug. 24, 2001 cont. - The evening ended fine. 7:30 pm he took ½ tsp of Paxil. He likes it; it is orange. He was asking a lot of questions driving me nuts. At least he wants to know!
August 25 – Connor had a full Adderall. He was in a real good mood. He got grumpier in the car to white sands @ 9:30 a.m. It was a rather good day. Took Paxil at bedtime.
August 26 – Sunday. Full Adderall. He was in a good mood. He was a bit grouchy with his brother @ 8a.m. Just normal brotherly irritation. His father said he noticed a difference with the violent outbursts. How calmed down he seemed.
Paxil in pm. Still gets up every night. (Been doing this since birth! : )
August 27 – Connor was up before 5 am shooting Darth Vader and his white naughty guys! Augh. He is catching his brother’s cold. 8a.m. Adderall.
Wondering if we should try the Adderall and just Paxil and see how he does. I will ask Dr on Tues & Thurs.
"Shooting"; breaking things; running @ house?
Connor jumped on me, hugging me and said he was VERY happy. I asked @ what and he said that the “no grumpies” (what we call Paxil) medicine was working. I noticed he was talking to Ian instead of yelling and asked Ian not to yell at him!
August 28 – Connor wanted up @ 4am, but I got him to lie down until 6 a.m., then he was up and running. He got frustrated with his G Aunt when he was trying to explain something. His fists were clenching, and then he just wanted to leave. It took a while for him to calm down.
He was a bit hyper @ Dr. Hendrickson’s office (psychologist). She thought he was happier than he had been the 2 wks prior. It was a fine day except for his need to hammer things into tiny pieces!?
½ tsp Paxil He has a cold and waking up at night and being awake.
August 29 – Adderall full. Tylenol for cold. Need to ask Dr. Starr if we leave the Adderall. Need to ask @ diagnosis for the therapist. Updated.
He is playing well this morning. He is anxious to go to school for swim day with Ian. He is still breaking things.
He had a hard time going to sleep. He was restless and waking up all through the night.
August 30 – Connor got up before 5 am. Ate a banana and took Adderall. Ask @ liquid Adderall; Paxil in am instead; cold medicine; new report for Dr. Hendrickson.
He is breaking and hammering things this a.m. Dr. Starr wants to stop the Adderall through the holiday and see. Paxil in a.m. He reacted to cold medicine with antihistamine, forgot he did that last time as well. He got aggressive etc.
August 31 – Paxil in a.m. See if sleeping changes. No Adderall. He was up by 5 am but not earlier! Gave him Tylenol cold instead.
Having trouble listening. He is a bit hyper and loud this am. He took a nap this afternoon. This is unusual. (No school due to electrical work.)
Playing with his brother this evening WITH TOYS! Dad is on his way home…..
September 1, 2001 – 4 am up and wide awake. He napped in the car @ 9:30. Destructive. This is probably normal to an extent. His morbid talk includes: death, dying, blowing up the car etc.
Connor had gone with his dad to town. In the hardware store Connor began to not listen and mild misbehaving to calling his dad bad names. In the truck on the way home (my dad’s small Toyota), Connor started scratching and telling Jim he hated him. He wanted them to wreck and was kicking the gearshift out of gear, hitting, slamming his head into his dad, causing him a nosebleed. When Jim tried to restrain his legs he would throw himself in the gearshift throwing it out of gear. Jim tried to use his forearm to restrain Connor against the door. Jim spanked him, which proved to be no good. (I have told him not to, being afraid he may lose his temper.) This spurred Connor into more aggression. And he tried to throw himself out of the moving truck. (Dad wrote.)
As soon as Jim walked in the door he declared he would not take him into public again; he could not handle his son or his problems…. (In front of both children and my father.) Language always leaves a lot to be desired esp when one is describing one's son! Ugh.
I will call Dr. Starr Tuesday a.m. Tues we also have an apt with Dr. Hendrickson @ 2pm.
How can his father learn to take care of his son and his problems when he cannot handle any pressure and stress?
September 2 – I got Connor to stay in bed. Changed his diaper, filled his juice, and he staying in bed until 8am!
Paxil and cold medicine. Playing outside. He tried peeing on the floor. Yelling at me when he was in time out.
His dad wrote in the log: Siding with father when mommy & daddy were having a discussion. He started saying he was going to kill her. He grabbed a belt and said he was going to tie her up and kill her. He tends to protect the non-aggressor or the one he feels is being picked on.
Connor broke the phone wires to our house outside. He bent the hallway vent. It is one thing after another. I called Dr. Starr. @ 2pm I broke down and gave him Adderall. He is grumpy.
September 3 – Paxil, Tylenol, Adderall. He is in a better mood. When something did not go his way he tried to lash out with arms, scratching, etc. Not sure what to do with Connor or for him. Connor hit his brother in the stomach. And 4 times since then I had to physically restrain him from hitting, biting, punching, kicking, scratching, etc. me. He is talking extremely loud. Not listening. 1:20 pm
He said he didn’t want to be killed. He said he was tired of his sickness. I couldn’t get much else that made sense in the current situation. Connor and I had two more incidents before 2:30. He physically was trying to hit, punch, and scratch.
If I tried to walk away, he came after me. If he was restrained he lashed as best he could and did get me a few times including biting me. After releasing him he pulled his knee up and gave himself a small bloody nose (right side). Now he is watching a movie and lying down and eating a bit of popcorn. He did not eat his lunch.
Have not had “physical” problems since before school. And never repeated the type of attack he did earlier. No more attacks. He remained fairly calm.
I remember his brother asking me what I was doing to Connor when I was restraining him. (Crossing his arms with my legs over his.) He asked me not to hurt his brother. I wanted to die.
September 4 – No Adderall; ½ Paxil. I called Dr. Starr and told her about the weekend. She is calling out of town for further help in Albuquerque or Las Cruces.
Good morning. We went to G Aunt’s. She called and said he was VERY hyper. I went and picked him up. This was unusual for her to want me to pick him up. It has been a fairly good a.m. He woke @ 2:30 and has been on the go, fully awake.
I went to school to get Connor for psych apt. Miss Haese said he looked very tired when he got there, but once he had lunch he was on the go again. Got Connor @ 1:30 pm He had trouble not being into things in the waiting room, but was ok. He pulled open the blinds and would not listen to oral scolding. I got up, told him not to do that, told him to go to the chair for time our and he decided to do the scratching, hitting, biting. Luckily, the therapist saw this one and took him to her office and peeling him off me.
After a while I went in and told her @ meds, what went on over the weekend and he again got me a few good bites, etc.
I have noticed twice he was not serious, but being mischievous. But during the weekend his look was serious and severe. I left again and he and Dr. Mary went until time to leave.
Two weeks ago his behavior was great. He took his time-outs, even while mad. He told his brother not to yell at him He was calm, picked up toys, and listened without me repeating it 10x’s and having him tell me back what I said. Nothing out of the ordinary has occurred. What happened? Dr. Hendrickson (psychologist) called Dr. Starr who later called and said to wean him off of the Paxil. We have outpatient apt Mon. 10am for Connor at Mesilla Valley Hospital in Las Cruces.
We picked up dinner. We were there 5 minutes and he couldn’t behave. Had an incident, which I believe was “normal” defiance, which cleared. He had a couple of nasty looks, but for the most part, was okay all evening. He had a hard time getting to sleep even though he was exhausted.
September 5 – He woke early, but since he was with me, I got him to sleep until 6:30. ¼ tsp Paxil and Tylenol.
He peed on the carpet. I made him clean it up. No real reason for doing it that he could give me. It was mostly an uneventful am. We did ABC puzzle he was pleased with. We ran to the store. He played in the clothes racks. Got a donut and returned home. He played outside and in.
Aunt Tess and Grandma stopped in. (Which generally makes him happy.) All was fine and suddenly got my legs bit & scratched. Showing off now? I don’t know, since they were leaving. Grandma tried to get a hug. I thought it might distract him, but he tried to break her eyeglass chain and did go on a bit after they had left. He did calm down.
I asked how he felt @ 10:45 and he said fine. We looked briefly at Halloween items (one of his favorite things), but then he lost interest. It may be because it was on the computer instead of in a booklet.
Around his eyes (under) look dark. Usually he has light red bags under them, which I never liked, but doctors were never concerned about it.
Kiss and hug and on school bus @ 11:20a.m. 3pm he was home on bus.
We went over to his G Aunt & Uncle’s house. He started up with scratching etc. Uncle Robert took him and although he was still doing it, it was more mischievous. But he also did it with my aunt, which he NEVER would normally even try. He decided he didn’t want to go and was drug out even when my aunt used her “stern” voice that he nearly always listens to. He ran back in and I carried him out.
At home there was an incident where I spanked him and put him in time out and he behaved rather well. Outside and inside, bath. He went to sleep with no problems. That’s been unusual. Maybe it is because the Paxil is getting out of his system. Not eating like he used to. He usually eats me out of house and home, and not now.
September 6 – ¼ tsp Paxil – last Dose. Went to G Aunts to be watched.
She wrote:
7:30 - We had a good time. He put all my notices on the gates. He played with Ian on the playground, went to the bank, he told the teller hello and got a grape sucker, which he ate. We got my meds from Wal-Mart and he found the pumpkins! He loves Halloween!
We went to Lots of Shops, grandma opened our trunk of pumpkins etc for the shop and when she wouldn’t open the other he “exploded”. I took him out to the hall and laid him down. I sat on my Rascal and told him to be still and he asked for his mom and cried some, but he became very quiet. Then he got up on the Rascal with me and we went to get drinks. He talked to Kathy and was okay. We told Grandma goodbye and we came home. We got Ian at 11 a.m., ate chicken, cheese, and boiled eggs. We took Connor to school. He and Ian played on the playground until the teacher took Connor in. He was happy and okay.
Mom: There was one incident where he tried to “attack” me. I pushed him away and walked away…He since has been playing well with his brother. Seems fairly happy.
September 7 – No meds at all! He has been cheerful. Watch a bit of TV. Talking to electricians. All fine. Attempted a “fit” when he couldn’t have chips for breakfast. He tried peeing on the floor.
September 7 – School – off fine. Home fine. 4:45pm he disagreed @ him taking a bath. He was defiant, yelling struggling, fighting to get him dressed again. His father is on the way home. Connor loves baths and I have always joked he had to be the cleanest toddler around! He has done this since he was a baby on.
He was okay until he “made” a gun and I told him no guns and to throw it away. He threw it, and then didn’t want his time out. (He did not throw it out until I got up to put him in his time out.)
Playing.
September 8 - Slept until 7:30 am! Connor was agitated in the car with his brother. Ian was talking LOUD to get his attention. Connor told him he didn’t like loud talking/noise.
He slept briefly in the car. Took a lighter from a store. We will return it tomorrow. He said he wanted to cook with it. Shortly after our talk @ it, he peed his pants. (There was no yelling or spanking.)
He is getting easily frustrated when he can’t do things. He did rather well in church. We ate dinner and all went without incident. We came home, brushed, bed, all fine.
Sept 9 – Connor’s Birthday! His is 5! Got up at 8am (Had gotten up 1x and crawled in with us.) Okay early a.m. He is a bit “mopey” today. Complained of a stomachache.
Went to family birthday party. He ate a lot of turkey, drank a bit of a soda. He played. Had gifts. He was very excited even about the cards. Got a tummy ache problem; ate too much cake.
We got gas, drove around and came home. He took a bath and was allowed to play with new things for a while and off to bed.
Problems: When meds were working he seemed more coordinated. I did not have to repeat something 5+ times and move his face to look at me. There were a couple odd weeks where he was so very happy and HE FELT GOOD.
His father has gone through many medicines, not stimulants from 1998 to present. Currently, Jim is on Lithium 3x’s a day and Wellbutran and says he is feeling better. I want COBP considered for Connor!
September 10 – Okay when he got up. Been getting worse. Unhappy, frustrated with a book he is working on. He peed on the floor 1st thing. We had a talk about going straight to the toilet when he gets up in the morning.
He was very unhappy with his Dad going to work. Fighting a lot with his brother. He hurt his brother with a toy. He did not get out of the car at his G Aunts. He slept most of the way to Las Cruces and looks exhausted. 8:55am.
When we arrived at Mesilla Valley he said he was hungry. They were kind enough to give us some breakfast. He ate and drank quite a bit. He drank half of his milk.
He was fidgety in the office and slept on the way home. He stayed in the car again and rested more when we got back to A Joeys. He said he was very tired. He was irritable and grouchy most of the afternoon. Evening was better. He didn’t eat too much dinner.
September 11 – Connor slept until nearly 8am. This is unusual since he napped two times yesterday. Usually he would not go to sleep as fast as he did nor sleep that late. Good spirits, playing, went to town with me.
Took “treats” for classmates and left for school in good spirits as well. Connor was disappointed they didn’t pass his snacks out. Don’t know if Miss Haese was gone.
But he’s in a pretty cheerful mood. Loveable. Did fine. No major problems this evening.
Note: Either this eve or the next day Connor cut all the wires from the 2 batteries to he and Ian’s Jeep (electric vehicle). They love to drive @ the yard. He’s been cutting things a lot. But when asking questions and explaining what cutting them does, he seemed not to have any comprehension.
September 12 – Connor and Ian were up at 5:30 am He got upset he did not hug/kiss his brother goodbye when Ian went to school. Some times he gets so upset over things out of the blue. We got dressed, went to G A Joey’s and went @ to thrift stores. Came home, saw Dada, went to school on the bus.
Home, he looks tired. Yelling @ brother. Now he is having a snack before his apt with Dr. Hendrickson. He seems a bit bordering annoyed that his brother is coming. Being definite in telling Ian that Dr. Mary is the doctor for HIM. 3:15pm
Connor was playing with Dr. Mary’s phone and she told him he couldn’t play with it. He got really upset, pulling on the door, crying, yelling, and wanting out. Ian got upset hearing his brother from the lobby.
Dr. Mary noticed his level of being upset was quick and higher than may usually be for someone. He said he did not like her and wanted to leave. He acted up, I think for her benefit.
The rest of the evening went okay. He and Ian got sent to bath early as one of them threw a rock and hit the kitchen window and both denied it. He did not eat much dinner. He went to sleep fairly easily. Got up at 2am, got in bed and went back to sleep.
September 13 - Connor got up and got dressed. Talked to Dr. Mary about consequences for “wetting” @ the house. Put that into play. However, due to weather he is fully dressed. Eating quite a bit. Going a bit stir crazy as he loves to play outside and it is still raining. 9:50 am
Connor got angry that he could not go outside and plays.
12:50 Connor’s teacher just called. She said he had one time last week where he got very angry – she said like something just set him off. They told him he had to sit back down. Today and yesterday he was very calm. Did the weather have anything to do with it?
Connor off bus. Bus driver commented how he’s been falling asleep left and right. I too noticed and wonder if he is just exhausted. I called Dr. Starr and she said maybe it is just him off meds and getting a routine again. Said if he gets fever or anything she will have a look at him. Being okay now. Said he was tired, but playing.
Connor got annoyed his brother was on his chair and shoved him off. He went straight to time out. While I built things for Ian (I was to build something for Connor until he got in trouble)…. Connor screamed and yelled that he wanted me to build for him; he didn’t like Ian; that I was his mother. It lasted at least 5 minutes.
When he played with brother things got destroyed. Not sure, but it was probably mutual. 4:30pm
Another outburst with brother over the play dough. Had difficulty getting him to go to the chair and staying. Spanked 1 x in the end. He ate pretty well at dinner. 2 ½ helpings of R Beef. 5:30
Bath, Dinosaur Doc, bed, out before 1st book was done.
September 14 – Up at 6 am. Went to toilet. Ate waffle, played with brother, got dressed, brother on bus, still “eating”. He played outside! Watching Sesame Street. Played outside, Came in snotty and defensive when I asked what he was doing 10:50.
Got ready for school and we crossed the street to wait for the bus. He came home and showed me his papers. He was very proud esp. of his balloon, pictures. Bath; had dinner; played. He and his brother got into trouble and were sent to bed early.
September 15 – Connor crawled in @ 2:30am (wet diaper). Up by 6am. He got dressed; we went grocery shopping with his brother and I. Behaved very well. Home. Trying to eat everything…. Playing, trying to destroy things. I.e., I made a Lego house for Ian and Connor was trying to tear it up. Did not like not being allowed to. Found another wire cut on the house with scissors (grooming scissors, men’s), still attached to the wire. Augh!
Connor did well for the most part. He ate some dinner and went to sleep quickly.
September 16 – Got up @ 7am. Watching Scooby a bit and playing @ the house. Got in trouble and told me “no” a couple of times when I sent him to his room. Normal kid stuff. Says he doesn’t like me.
Got lunch ready and left boys with Dada less than 1 hour. When I got home Dada and Connor had been having problems. The boys were made to pick up and the day went on. Ate an early dinner @ a pizza place. Did not eat well, but behaved better than he previously had. No major incident before bed.
September 17 – Connor was up @ 6:30-6:45am. He sat in the chair, got dressed (dressed himself), went outside with Ian & I to wait on his bus. Had gotten in trouble for trying to get chips and was sneaking old ones from the table. He got a few chips and was throwing them on the ground; possibly for the birds.
We went to A Joey & U Robert’s house he played outside. Came in being annoyed, putting hands in my face, squirming, not responding to verbal reprimand. I took him outside and warned him about behavior at other peoples’ houses.
We went & met A Joey at WM. He got a hotdog and ate it. Did have cereal before we went. We went home after a couple of stops for bills. Home playing outside mostly. He is anxious for school to start. He left on the bus @11:20 am. Waiting his arrival home 2:46pm.
September 18 – Got up a bit mopey. He ate a waffle, milk shake (tiny). He is waiting for school. Played outside a bit. Tried a memory game on the computer (new). He played 10 min maybe. He has red under his eyes. He is anxious for school. He wanted me to come for a pizza party. He got a bit upset (not angry)@ me because I had not planned to go. Not sure if I will now.
I picked up Connor. He had a great time at the pizza party. He ate two large cheese pieces, played games, got 2 balloons and was happy. We had a psychology apt at 3pm. He got upset when he took his gum out of his mouth, put it on his chair, and in his mouth, and I made him throw it away. He cried. In the office he was fine for maybe 10 minutes. He tossed toys, did not want to pick up. Very testy @ what Dr. Hendrickson and he would do and started on me. I then left the room. He got upset a bit. We ended leaving a bit early. He was grumpy most of the rest of the evening.
September 19 – Got up @ 12:30 am for a drink. He wet 2 diapers and then wet my bed!
Had a bath, got dressed. He went to A Joey’s while I went to a parent/teacher conference. He was fine until I came and he acted up a bit. He's been grumpy off and on. Not feeling too well. He was sneezing this a.m. Perhaps he is getting a cold. He is very tired, cranking, and laying about. Went to sleep within 30 seconds of covering him up!
The teacher said he’d been really calm these past two weeks. She is very concerned about him being able to handle moving on the Kindergarten. They are doing a test on him soon and they will let me know the results. She is not sure he is prepared socially for the Kindergarten atmosphere. It will depend on how well he does between now and Christmas.
September 20 – Connor and Ian had no tea at bedtime. He got up 1 time early to get a drink and we got up. We went to town and saw A Joey. Ate. Decided to go visit their Dad in El Paso. He slept a lot of the way there. We saw his dad. He was a little down that Dada had to go back to work after lunch. Giving Dad ultimatums about working where we live!
He behaved well on McD’s play area. Again, would climb up the slide to the 2nd floor, but was very afraid to climb up the huge squares. Something about it makes him afraid. Perhaps the netting does not make him feel safe. The boys got a bit too rough and we dropped off dad and came to the hotel. He was disappointed that there was no pool, but settled for a couple of baths!
Normal fighting with Ian. Then got really upset and when he was told to sit down to calm down he started screaming and yelling.
After a while he asked to go home. He said it wasn’t feeling well. He lay down. Mild playing now. 4:05pm - Out to eat. Okay for the most part. Watched a movie, talked and wiggled etc. Normal. Went to sleep pretty quickly.
September 21 – Up…. playing, TV, playing. Two baths! Must be the cleanest toddler around! Will have to get to lunch and drive home soon.
September 22 – Up one time last night. AM - He saw a balloon, which he loves. Okay. He and his brother were misbehaving in town. He was/is going through a time where he listens to no one. He talks back, calls names, and says no. His brother also seems to be following suit. He got a spanking and put in his room. When he calmed down he was told what would/wouldn’t occur if he did not behave.
September 23 – Arguing with brother, playing with Ian all day. No major incidents.
September 24 – Mopey. He got dressed; we got Ian on the bus. He said his legs hurt in the store, but we hadn’t walked much. He said he wasn’t feeling well. He is very agitated by my blender noise this a.m. No TV, any playing, moping 8:35 am.
Eating a banana. Laying about and very irritable. He is a bit more cheerful. He got dressed for school and on the bus. All afternoon and most of the evening it was, “Will you just leave me alone?!” Figting with Ian; hitting. He lost TV privileges and eventually they were both sent to bed early.
September 25 – Connor was up more than once in the night. Peeing in more than one diaper. (I had been using cloth diapers on the boys by this time at night only.)
Up by 6:15a.m. Not long before fighting with Ian. He got dressed after a bath. He had two apples from our tree and brother asked for one. No go. I asked Connor to give Ian one and he refused. I told him to go in the front room. He closed the door. He tried to lock it. (They can’t lock or unlock that one!)
When I came in and said something he ignored me. He is bordering on civil and going off. Apt with psychologist in 30 minutes. Connor didn’t want to do much partaking with Dr. Mary. He wanted to leave after @ 5 minutes.
I got a calendar and am setting up incentives for regular stuff and staying dry at night. He’s been crabby off and on. He played pretty well with Ian outside and eating dinner well.
September 26 – We started the sticker incentives. I told him to get up to tinkle and I would put diaper back on. He got up 5:50a.m. And went in the toilet. Both Connor and Ian got a sticker! Dry Diapers! Not as excited as I thought he would be.
Fussing with Ian first thing. Brothers! Both dressed and outside @ 7:22a.m. Pretty excited about sticker calendar. Fairly good mood. Decided to get own cereal and milk!
Calling Mesilla Valley, but no response. Off to school with a kiss and hug. Off the bus fine. His father had come home (early). His dad had a disagreement with me over something in the house. The he cussed etc. Not saying it couldn’t have happened any way, but Connor’s behavior went too. Yelling, name-calling, spitting, hitting, kicking, etc. He said after a calm minute something about his dad not agreeing with something to do with me.
Change in schedule – Slept @ G Aunt Joey’s. She wrote:
Wed p.m. went to sleep after being told several times and read too. Awoke at 7:10 in good spirits, went to the bathroom, and laid on A Joey’s bed. He wasn’t ready to get dressed. After I got dressed I asked him to get dressed and he said he wasn’t ready so I turned off the TV. And told him as soon as he was dressed we could turn the TV on and he dressed quickly.
We left to take Ian to school. We went to get the truck washed. Connor went into the store by himself and got the ticket. I praised him. We went to WM, got an icy, donut, and hot dog. He ate some, sat quietly and we talked about the people walking by. Took ½ the hotdog home and the donut. The he ate it watching Disney. He was very quiet while A Joey did her paper work. 8:45am.
Watched TV. Disney movie and all went ok. I have a tool set and he looked it over for 35-40 minutes. He was very fascinated by all the parts that come out. At 10:30 we left to get Ian. Got Ian and went to (cousin) Johnny’s school. We surprised him and he got to have lunch with us. We 5 sat at a special visitors table. Connor ate a couple of bites, and then they let the boys play on the playground with him. They all had a good time.
We took Connor to school. Robert told the teacher that he hadn’t eaten much. We picked him up at 2:45pm. He was in good spirits. We got and ice cream and French fries. When he dropped a French fry I said, “Oops, pick it up”, and he said, “No. I hate you.” He picked up the fry and ran in the front room and hid under the rocker. He was there 30 minutes. No one said anything to him and he didn’t say anything. Then he went out to the tree and everything was normal. He, Robert, and Ian played Frisbee, read a book, and all okay. 4:30pm
Mom and Dad picked the boys up. He was on the go until bedtime. Fairly well behaved. Note: Father being tested for PTSD. Wet diaper.
September 29 –Dressed, ate, choc milk, chores done for stickers. He had a wet diaper, so no “special” sticker. Outside to play and put brother on the bus. We visited A Joey. His U Robert asked about his constant talk about death, dying, killing, etc.
I ran a couple of errands and we came home. No major upsets. Off to school. Back home @ 3:05pm. He was in a good mood, happy to show me and explain his papers. Looking for something to eat!
Eve – Connor was in trouble for doing something over the neighbor’s fence. He was told he would have to stay in the house. He did not like it and it launched into “no”, yelling, screaming, kicking walls. He was sent to his room. He went on for quite some time. Eventually, he did apologize and was allowed out, but he’d lost TV. Put them to bed @ 7pm and he went right away.
September 29 – Up @ 5:50am. Wet diaper. Good mood but started up with Ian. He got dressed and we went to several garage sales. He did pretty well. We got lunch, came home, visited (briefly) with Grandma. Hw was happy he saw Grandpa. It made him very glad. Home. Off and on fighting with Ian – sibling stuff.
5:45pm Yelling and bickering with Ian. I told both to come in and wash hands for dinner. Conner wanted to still play out. (I should have explained he could probably go back out after dinner. However, Connor started with the No, I want to stay out” etc. Hw was given to 3 or no TV. They did not. So when he finally came in and was told he would have no TV. He sat in his chair yelling that he WOULD watch TV etc.
Finally, I sent him to his room, as he would not quit screaming. On the way he hit stuff, pushed a board, which in turn knocked over my TV. He’s been screaming, kicking etc for 15 minutes so far. He finally calmed down, but was in there at least 10 more minutes. He fussed that he didn’t want what I fixed for dinner; he wanted spaghetti. He finally ate. Played outside for a while and is now bathing. Then I will have them brush and off to bed.
7:15 he fussed @ movie being turned off. He brushed and went to bed. His father was having a hard time with building in another room. When I went to talk to him, Connor screamed. I went back in to finish their story and asked what was wrong. He said he didn’t like “THAT”. Then he went to sleep.?
September 30 – Up by 6 a.m. Wet diaper. He dressed himself. Overfilled the cat food himself! :)
Church – he is so loud. He just can’t seem to get it. I can’t seem to get it across. We went home after a quick stop to the store for milk. He requested a gallon of Chocolate milk, and I said okay. They’ve drank @ ½ of it. Bickering with Ian off and on. Ate at pizza place. He ate some. He ate a lot of watermelon.
They played outside and watched bits of movies. He threw sand on his father. Hid Dad was NOT happy and did not handle it well. (Dads had bad anxiety etc. since Wednesday. Not sure how to deal with that.) Ate dinner; played outside, both, now eating Jell-O and will go to bed by 8pm.
Dad having more severe panic attacks.
October 1, 2001 – Wet diaper. Connor got up and dressed. After Ian was on the bus we went to the store. He ate some little pancakes. We got groceries. He did not like “no” in the store, but nothing major. I had him help more.
We paid bills etc. with him. We went to library and home. He got on the bus okay.
Home off bus. As soon as he was in the house he was grumpy and indifferent to brother. Wanting him to leave him alone and stay away. Ian wanted to play with brother and showed him his new play dough. Normally, Connor would be excited and start playing, but seemed blah. He had a snack.
Played outside and shoved Ian down a slide with his feet (tennis shoes). Several times Ian cried due to Connor doing SOMETHING to him. Sometimes Connor seems sorry, but other times he seems amused.
Bath. Didn’t eat much. Asking when Dada will be home. Ate some Jell-O, but not as much as he usually would. He went to sleep quickly.
October 2 – Connor is still asleep 7:10a.m. Very unusual. Wet Diaper. 7:30 Connor ran outside and yelled by to his brother. He had gotten himself dressed. He was upset to know he can’t go to school today. Upset about this last night as well.
In the kitchen, the door was open, and he said angrily, “Momma, I broke your air pump because I didn’t like it”. This is his comment a lot in response to breaking things.
Playing play dough and waiting on boiled eggs 7:30am.
Asking about Dada. Being snotty. He does not want to change pants. He got ready to leave and ran about. We got his brother and lunch on the road to Las Cruces. He played on the way. Eating and said he did not get enough to eat. He waited well in the car. Connor did rather well as I filled out papers and we waited. He has this thing about putting money in machines for soda.
We went in. He fidgeted, played briefly, and asked repeatedly to tinkle. We went. During the last ½ he asked for a snack.
The doctor (Gonzalez, MD) asked if Jim had a violent temper and asked if Connor had witnessed the abuse.
He told me about things more like ADHD and Bi-polar. If it is Bi-Polar he will have it his whole life. He sent us for blood tests. Also, said we may get a brain test and scan. He is going to treat Connor for Bi-Polar with Depokote if his liver tests okay.
Connor did NOT want them to “take” his blood. As in they were going to take it all. He didn’t even want their stickers! We go back next Tuesday. Afterwards we went to his special McDonald’s and then to Big Lots where he picked out a flashlight (Halloween) for he and Ian.
Was briefly upset on the way home as he thought I was buying a toy that I did not buy. He was okay at home and at A Joey’s. Eating still! Best he has eaten in a while!
Playing seems fairly happy. Did accidentally give Ian a bloody lip rough housing! 6:30pm Took bathes, ate mystery dinner, watched a Pooh movie. Brushed teeth, tinkled, story, and to sleep! DRY DIAPER!!!! (Continued in notebook #2.)
On Medications August 17 – September 6, 2001
Connor’s emotions cycle many times during the day. The ratings are an overall for the day.
August September
17 Low 1 Awful
18 Low 2 Bad
19 Good 3 Awful
20 Hyper 4 Hyper
21 Low 5 Mixed
22 Bad 6 Mixed
23 Good 7 Good to Bad
24 Hyper 8 Low
25 Good 9 Low
26 Good 10 Low
27 Very Good 11 Good
28 Very Good 12 Emotional
29 Mixed 13 Low/Bad/Sleepy
30 Mixed 14 Good
31 Hyper 15 Good
September
16 Good 27 Good
17 Good 28 Good to Very Bad
18 Low/Good/Bad 29 Bad
19 Low 30 Good
20 Good
21 Good
October
22 Bad 1
23 Good 2 Good so far
24 Low/Down
25 Low/Down
26 Ok/Bad
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