Just another Day - 20 May 2010

Thursday, May 20, 2010


Connor has been increasingly defiant. When he is good there are few issues past normal child things. When it is not going his way & I try to get him to his room for his melt down, it is getting very difficult. He knows that he is big & heavy & to physically get him there, I have to work hard.


The reason it is best for him in his room is that it is clear of items to rip off of walls, things to break, etc. After a horrible fight between us yesterday, he was finally in his room, cursing at me. I went to mine & cried & prayed! After a bit Faith told me she found his screen in the yard, so I knew he had left.


He came home just as I was getting everyone in the car to go look. (Ian had already checked his friends' house down the alleyway.)


Everyone keeps telling me to send him to his father for a while over the summer. I am still not comfortable with this, despite it would give us all a break. The last time I talked to Jim @ needing to set up medical etc, instead of saying he'd work on it, he said, "Yeah, I can't handle it." Helpful.


I have come close to contacting him @ it, but just am not happy about it. I will be having surgery June 14a & am not sure Tess can handle things if Connor is here too. I will be in the hospital a couple of days & recovering at home after that. I can order from bed.


I feel guilty for the hard time I am having & I feel bad for the hard time he is having between Bi-Polar & teenage hormones! He is increasingly hurtful to his siblings. As much as you try to tell them why or to ignore it, it can help only so much.


Connor & Ian got in a "brotherly" fight last week. A bloody nose resulted.


Ian has been doing well. I don't have a lot of complaints really. He's had issues with school, but his school is the problem & that is about done now. Just being on his own is hard.